10 Mar 2017

Thoughts Of A 25 Year Old


When I was a child I thought I'd be married by twenty-five. Or maybe it was twenty-three. Either way, I'm now twenty-five and I'm not married. Or engaged. Or in a relationship. But that's okay. In hindsight, being settled by twenty-three seems a bit steep. But as many of my peers are currently getting engaged and married, it seems that twenty-five would have been a bit more of a realistic guess. Does it bother me that I'm not one of those people who are now settling down? It did, but not anymore. Everyone's path is different. And you can't preempt the exact date you'll meet the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. My particular path just allows me more time to work on other things in my life. 

All throughout my life I viewed twenty-five as the age where youth comes to an end, when you officially can't be considered 'young' anymore. Now that I am that age I simultaneously feel very old and very young. I feel old, because yes, I'm beginning to leave my youthful years behind me. But I simultaneously feel young. Probably because the fear of losing my youth has me hyper aware that it still exists. And I want to take advantage of it in a way I didn't when I was even younger. To make the most of it before it goes away. 

Years ago I had decided that I would start using anti-ageing creams before the age of twenty-five, because that is widely believed to be the age where your skin starts to show signs of age. I didn't quite start doing that before the cut off date, though I experimented here and there. But now I am beginning to actively look around for the best anti-ageing products, ready to add that extra purchase to my list of products that I buy regularly, and cement it into my daily routine. This isn't a choice that everyone will make, but it's one that my vanity is at least happy to partake in.

I'm twenty-five, but I'm still at uni, as an undergrad. This is mostly due to mental and physical health issues that have come between me and my education in the past. But now as a twenty-five year old student I find myself embarrassed. When people ask me what I do I hesitate to say 'student'. And if I'm asked my age in a university setting I almost want to lie. None of this was an issue to me until my last birthday, but it seems to me that twenty-five is the age that makes you sound like a bonafide adult that should have their life together. 

Some people decide to stay 'twenty-five forever', to pretend that they're that age for as long as they can get away with, as an attempt to hold onto their dwindling youth. But not me.

For me twenty-five is a transitional period, much like eighteen was. Of course it's scary when things are visibly changing around you and you feel the need to catch up. But I will ride out the painful limbo that is my mid-twenties, and once I do I will be ready to embrace whatever the next phase of my life will be, like I've done with every other previous phase of my life. And whenever I do enter it, it will be because it will come naturally. 


Amani x 
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3 comments

  1. Love this post, I feel the same I'm 24 in August and not in a relationship, whilst some of the other friends have had babies and engaged, I try not to let it bother me but I did think I would be committed around this age too! As for Uni, don't be embarrassed it's an achievement at any age :) x

    S x | SHELISES WORLD

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    1. Thank you :) And I'm glad you can relate to the post ! x

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  2. Society puts too much emphasis on when to accomplish. Achievement is of course personal and going back to university at any age rewarding and an achievement in itself . Life's a journey to be taken at your own pace, Amani no one, not even society should dictate what milestones you should achieve it's entirely depends on the individual. Far too much pressure placed on woman these days especially by society and other people. Just remember it's your life not there's.

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